Caitlin Ary

EP 24: Caitlin Ary

IG: @sanctu

Episode Transcript (autogenerated)

Dane Reis: [00:00:00] You booked it. Episode 24. Entertainers and performers of the world. I’m your host Dane Reis, and welcome to you. Booked it. Where I chat with inspiring entertainers, seven days a week, by digging into their journey. We’re going to discover everything you need to do to be a successful entertainer, you know, because training usually skips that part about how to actually make your skills work for you in the real world.

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[00:01:22] Let’s do this. Right. Let’s get started. I am excited to introduce my guest today. Kaitlin airy. Are you ready for this Caitlyn? 

[00:01:33] Caitlin Ary: [00:01:33] Oh yeah. All 

[00:01:34] Dane Reis: [00:01:34] right. Caitlin that was most recently seen on the Netflix original docu series West side. Following the lives of singer songwriters in Los Angeles credits include opium at cosmopolitan Lawson Vegas Baz star crossed love at the Palazzo theater in Las Vegas.

[00:01:54] She played the role of Saint Jimmy in West coast, regional premiere of American idiot. The drum playing tomboy basket case in for the record, the breath pack on Norwegian cruise lines for the record Tino at the Wallace Annenberg, she has also played Ilsa in spring awakening, Sally bowls in cabaret and Peter pan in Peter and Wendy.

[00:02:17] She loves playing gender bending or gender reverse roles as much as possible. Caitlin. That was a quick intro of who you are and what you’ve done, but why don’t you tell us a little bit more about yourself, fill in the gaps, who you are, where you’re from, where you’re currently calling home and a little bit more about what you do as a professional in the entertainment industry.

[00:02:41] Caitlin Ary: [00:02:41] Well, hello. I was born and raised in Burbank, California, and I currently live in Las Vegas and I’m a professional singer actor dancer. I basically will do whatever I’m paid to do. It’s artistic. I’ve gone through phases where, I was only dancing phases of doing straight plays, short films, classical music concerts.

[00:03:03] I was a background singer for a while. I was recording as a demo singer and then I even had one for our gig as a yodeler. So that happened once and I just love performing. So I kind of, if it’s artistic and I can do it, I’ll do it. I 

[00:03:20] Dane Reis: [00:03:20] love that. Well, let’s move on to the next section here. And of course I am a sucker for a good quote.

[00:03:28] What is your favorite quote that you’d like to share with our listeners? 

[00:03:32] Caitlin Ary: [00:03:32] Okay. I have two. The first one is perfect at all. Dura Dolores hick Tibi  by avid. It means be patient and tough someday. This pain will be useful to you and the other one. Is, I am a person who acts not an actor by Sam Neill. 

[00:03:52] Dane Reis: [00:03:52] And how have you applied both of those quotes to.

[00:03:56] Your daily life and your career. 

[00:03:59] Caitlin Ary: [00:03:59] So I basically use those both as motivation to never give into the darkness that often accompanies, deciding to be a performer as a career. I also, I don’t, I don’t really like to give into the terrible assumptions that, you need to trauma and depression to make art all of the like 27 club, because.

[00:04:19] That makes people that have depression like me and the kind of depression that inhibits them from making art, like me feel an added layer of deep guilt that my sadness isn’t somehow manifesting itself in my Magnum Opus. So the second quote is similar in nature. As far as staving off the darkness. Sam Neil was talking about how every actor or performer has this moment.

[00:04:42] Of intense self doubt in between every job. You know, if I’m not acting, singing, dancing, making art right now, can I really call myself an actor, singer dancer artist, and he makes a really good point that to keep your sanity, you have to remind yourself that you’re a person with a skillset, not a machine.

[00:05:01] So I really liked those two because most of the challenges, that I find in this business are just in myself, you know, and not at other people. And so I try to tell myself those as much as possible 

[00:05:17] Dane Reis: [00:05:17] for sure. I really, really like those quotes and the way you’ve applied them to your life, because it is, it is really difficult sometimes to move between.

[00:05:28] Gig to gig or production to production. And it is the uncertainty that comes with this industry. But I think the, on the flip side, we’re also so lucky that we get to explore so many different parts of us and so many different ways to express our art and what we have inside and to create. And the unfortunate part of that journey is that it’s, we’re also going to experience some laws.

[00:05:55] Yeah. Great. Well, let’s move on to this section and Kate, of course you are an entertainer. I’m an entertainer. And I think you’d agree that the entertainment industry is one of the most subjective, brutally, honest, personally emotional industries. We know of, and you know, as well as I that to create and to have a successful career in this industry, like you’re having now takes a lot of dedication and hard work.

[00:06:23] And while of course, we are going to experience a lot of fun and excitement, being an entertainer, doing our various projects, there will also be our fair share of obstacles and challenges and failures that we’re going to have to experience. And we’re going to have to learn to move forward through. Tell us, what is one key challenge, obstacle or failure you’ve experienced in your career and how did you come out the other side better because 

[00:06:52] Caitlin Ary: [00:06:52] of it?

[00:06:55] Well, the Netflix show, Now right now. So we created a show and, it just kind of got lost in the algorithm and went into obscurity. Yeah, the moment it was released and basically everyone around us for two years straight, we’re prepping all of us in the cast for overwhelming life-changing fame and how we could possibly cope with it.

[00:07:17] We took classes, we were, we were taking, We were taking sessions on training for social media training for interviews. And, in the end, it, the show wasn’t even reviewed badly. It just wasn’t reviewed. So I’m honestly coming out of it right now during the pandemic. And it’s actually helped. That I can’t feel guilt for not working as hard as I possibly can since every single one of us is in the same limbo about our careers as live entertainers.

[00:07:45] But it’s made me realize that so many performers have had gigs that they thought were the one that really weren’t and that I have to keep trying anyway, because I’m sure there are so many untold stories of. Gigs that people thought were about to make their career explode and then we’ve never even heard of them, you know?

[00:08:06] And also I have no real other livable skill sets because I kind of put all my eggs into this entertainer basket. And so to my parents. So, this is kind of my only option and I, and I have always kind of made it my only option that I’m like rejection and failure in this industry. It’s just part of the deal and.

[00:08:28] You have to keep going because I don’t have, I have not given myself out because I don’t want an out because I, I have to force myself to stay here because I know that if I, if there was a way out, an easy way out, then I might take it and I don’t want to take it. Right. 

[00:08:44] Dane Reis: [00:08:44] I love that. Well, let’s move to the next section now to a time that I like to call your spotlight moment.

[00:08:53] That one moment in time you realized, yes, I am going to be an entertainer for living or maybe it was, yes. This is what I need to be doing as an entertainer. Tell us about that. 

[00:09:08] Caitlin Ary: [00:09:08] Yeah. I’ve always known since, since middle school that this is what I wanted to do. I remember. That I just wanted to be an actor.

[00:09:15] I really wanted to do standup comedy when I was a kid, I wanted to be a magician. I wanted to be around rider. And then I saw a West side story at the high school I was going to go to. And the girl that played anybodies was so good that I was like, Oh, that’s what I need to do. I’m going to join choir.

[00:09:37] I’m like I have to do that. I have to be that. And then from there kind of just took off. I just never, ever thought of anything else I could possibly do with my life, other than perform since I was 12. And, my mom, was a singer and actor. And so she was really supportive. My dad is an architect and he’s since for the past 20 years, like been building these enormous, show choir sets, at our high school.

[00:10:03] And so. My family is pretty supportive of me doing the one thing I’m really good at. And I think it’s lucky that I’m good at it. And I want to do it because there are some people that want to do it. That aren’t very good. And some people that are really good that would rather not. And sometimes that feels like a shame, you know, 

[00:10:26] Dane Reis: [00:10:26] for sure.

[00:10:27] Well, let’s piggyback on that question too. You’re number one, cooked it moment. Walk us through that day, the audition and callbacks. If those happen to be part of it, what was going on in your life? And what about that moment? Makes it your favorite moment? 

[00:10:46] Caitlin Ary: [00:10:46] It was kind of a silly question because I, I am not a very good auditioner and every single awesome job I’ve ever gotten.

[00:11:00] Is from a friend, every single one in my 31 years of life. And not all my friends are performers or casting directors. I, because I’m not a very good auditioner. I think that’s why I always get awesome shows from people that have already seen me on stage in person. And they know that I can handle the roller gig.

[00:11:18]I have a lot of moments on stage that made me feel like pretty triumphant.

[00:11:28] Most of the audition things. I don’t think, I don’t even know if I’ve ever booked a job in my life based on me auditioning for strangers. I’m trying to think back, but I think every time it’s been someone who’s already heard that I’m pretty good. And putting faith in me that I’m pretty good or they’ve seen me already do something, which is a very strange thing.

[00:11:54]To even say out loud right now, since I audition all the time, 

[00:11:59] Dane Reis: [00:11:59] but you know what I find that that’s why it’s so important to, to network and to create industry relationships, because that’s how you create a long career. 

[00:12:11] Caitlin Ary: [00:12:11] Right? So there are some people that I’ve met. You know, when in my teens and early twenties where you just, you’re both starting out and you’re talking about the different projects you want to do, and then you go on your own part ways you go live your own lives through your own career.

[00:12:29] And then out of nowhere, that person, yeah. We’ll be like, Hey, remember that thing? We talked about a long time ago. Well, I’m doing it now. And I want you to be in it. And that’s kind of how things happen. You know, it’s not necessarily, I’ve always had this strange aversion to the word networking because I feel it’s a little bit disingenuous to like go to a place and then.

[00:12:54] Talk to people who all know that you’re to them to expand your career. And, and it just never seems, it seems like it’s exactly the same as just selling yourself, branding yourself, you know, on social media or through your website or through your, Through your posts. And I’m just not very good at that, but I am really good at finding people that I really connect with, that I have a lot in common with, and they just so happen to also be in the tree and doing projects that I really believe in.

[00:13:21] And because we’re actual friends, then we end up working together. It’s never like anything fake. It’s never anything that I’m, I’m only friends with this person because they can get me a job. You know, I would never do that. I don’t think I could stand doing that. 

[00:13:37] Dane Reis: [00:13:37] For sure. And I think you raise a really good point because there is a giant difference between disingenuine networking for the sake of networking and developing real, true relationships within your industry or anything, just developing real friendships and real relationships because.

[00:13:57] Depending on what market you’re in you in, in the entertainment industry? I think in general, a lot of times a lot of the relationships are so situational and can be purely for networking sake, but it really pays off to be honest and be genuine with people. And you don’t have to be. Everybody’s best friend.

[00:14:18] Everyone does not have to know who you are, but the people that do know who you are love you and they trust you and they know what you’re about. 

[00:14:26] Caitlin Ary: [00:14:26] Yeah. The trust thing I think is very important because that’s the thing that. Missing when you don’t have an actual connection with someone when you’re just, you know, quote unquote, networking with someone, they don’t really have any sort of level of trust with you if they haven’t worked with you.

[00:14:41] But when you actually develop a friendship, they have a deep trust in you to be like, Hey, we have a problem. Or we have a, we have something that needs to be solved on this stage right now. And I think this person who I know and trust can come fill that void. And solve our problem for us, which is really all like, you know, casting and performing is the casting people.

[00:15:05] They have, they need actors, they need singers, they need dancers, the singers and dancers and actors. Their problem is that they need a job. So putting those two things together, you’re gonna, you’re going to cast people you trust. 

[00:15:16] Dane Reis: [00:15:16] Absolutely. Well, let’s take a moment to talk about the present. What projects are you working on now?

[00:15:24] What are you looking forward to? And of course being amidst this global pandemic, how do you see the entertainment industry moving forward in the next couple of years? 

[00:15:34] Caitlin Ary: [00:15:34] Well, this interview has, has made me reflect about the things I should, I should be doing. I should be playing more guitar. I should be writing music.

[00:15:44] I should be fixing up our home studio, dancing at home. And as you know, personally, having kids makes being a self centered adult performer, a little bit more challenging because it’s hard to focus on just me, especially in a pandemic when we’re all stuck together in a house. So. that’s, that’s a bit challenging.

[00:16:03] And also I think America is kind of unironically getting just bored of the Corona virus. So it seems like they’re just going to pry open all the businesses until their hands are bloody. And I have no idea how long our industry is going to hold out, trying to stay closed, or even keep people socially distant since it seems other businesses are starting to give in, you know, before at the very beginning of this.

[00:16:26] I really was thinking, you know, everyone’s going to be very responsible because we’re all very scared. And now I’m starting to think that the amount of frustration and boredom really will open things earlier than they should. And, I think there’s probably gonna be some consequences to that, but I don’t know.

[00:16:47] It’s, it’s a really weird time to be. Existing as a performer where your job is already, like second to second, you don’t know what you’re doing, you know, and you’re just copying from job to job, trying to find some sort of stability. And now, like, it’s really hard to even think about the future when nobody knows what’s coming, you know, it’s hard to plan when there’s nothing to, to plan 

[00:17:15] Dane Reis: [00:17:15] for sure.

[00:17:16] Absolutely. Well, thank you for your insight on that. Well, let’s move on to one of my favorite sections in the interview and I call it the grease lightning round. I am going to ask you a handful of questions. I want you to answer them as quickly and concisely as possible one after. Are you ready? 

[00:17:35] Caitlin Ary: [00:17:35] Yes, I am.

[00:17:36] Dane Reis: [00:17:36] Great. First question. What was the one thing holding you back from committing to a career as an entertainer? 

[00:17:44] Caitlin Ary: [00:17:44] The fear of finding out I wasn’t actually that 

[00:17:46] Dane Reis: [00:17:46] good. Yes. I completely agree with you. and I think that us as entertainers, a lot of us, I know I struggled with that is that little voice in your head playing devil’s advocate.

[00:17:59] And the second question. What is the best piece of advice you have ever received 

[00:18:07] Caitlin Ary: [00:18:07] as cliche as it sounds. Be you be yourself, imitations of other people you think are good or what you think you want to be always fall flat and come across as just that and imitation. Even if you get rejected a thousand times times, and you think it’s because you are who you are, the perfect person or project hasn’t come across your perfect self yet, but it’s being made right now, dreaming that a person like you exists.

[00:18:36] I 

[00:18:36] Dane Reis: [00:18:36] love that. Thank you. Third question. What is something that is working for you right now, or if you’d like to go pre COVID, what was working for you before our industry went on? Pause, 

[00:18:48] Caitlin Ary: [00:18:48] auditioning a lot, even for things you don’t care for, it takes the pressure off of the ones you’re really actually hoping for.

[00:18:58] Dane Reis: [00:18:58] Fourth question. What is the best resource? A book, a movie, a YouTube video, a podcast, maybe a piece of technology that you found is helping your career right now. 

[00:19:11]Caitlin Ary: [00:19:11] this might be silly, but the movie, yes, man, with Jim Carrey, I always go back to, yes, man. it just brings me out of a funk. It reminds me to say yes to projects, to find ideas to new experiences, to that gig you feel mad about, but you have nothing else going on to that gig.

[00:19:27] That’s super far away. That seems inconvenient and to scary things you think you’re not good enough for? I love that. 

[00:19:34] Dane Reis: [00:19:34] I’ve not seen that movie and I’m a hundred percent going to have to watch 

[00:19:37] Caitlin Ary: [00:19:37] that. Great 

[00:19:40] Dane Reis: [00:19:40] fifth question. If you had to start your career from scratch, but you still had all the knowledge and experience you’ve collected from your career in this industry, what would you do or not do?

[00:19:53] Would you do anything differently or the same? 

[00:19:57] Caitlin Ary: [00:19:57] Oh Lord. Well, I would have definitely gone on a cruise ship in my early years and gotten all that, you know, money-making trap out of my system and who knows if they’ll even be a thing anymore after this, but I wish I would have been validated as a performer in that way.

[00:20:11] Like having a lengthy contract and traveled the world when I was younger also I would have figured out social media sooner and been able to treat it as kind of a business rather than. You know how it started as just something social, because I’m kind of bad at it. 

[00:20:28] Dane Reis: [00:20:28] Yeah. Cause it’s strange how Instagram especially has really become the running resume.

[00:20:35] Yeah. It’s suddenly a very important thing to take into consideration when. Having your career going to auditions because they’re asking for your hand, it 

[00:20:43] Caitlin Ary: [00:20:43] is very strange because it’s like, they, they want to know not only the last thing you did, but what are you doing right now? Even while you’re at this audition, what are you doing?

[00:20:53] What job do you have that never ends on the internet? Right? 

[00:20:57] Dane Reis: [00:20:57] Of course. Alright. And the last question. What is the golden nugget knowledge drop you’ve learned from your successful career in the industry that you would like to leave with? All of our listeners, 

[00:21:11] Caitlin Ary: [00:21:11] fear is the mind killer. That’s a quote from dune, and it’s one of the things that I actually say over and over and over.

[00:21:18] If I’m. Freaking out, or if I’m in a lot of like physical pain too, to like overcome it, I’ll just say fear is the mind killer over and over, because fear is always the thing stopping you from doing what you need to be doing from finishing that thing you started from going to that one last audition from submitting that song to a festival.

[00:21:40] And if you can’t eliminate fear, then just let fear hold hands with excitement of the unknown and just do it. I 

[00:21:49] Dane Reis: [00:21:49] love that. And Caitlin, to wrap up this interview, it is time to give yourself a plug. Where can we find you? How do our listeners connect with you? Is there anything you want to promote? 

[00:22:02] Caitlin Ary: [00:22:02] You can find me, at, at shoe, like sanctuary without the Arie park.

[00:22:07] Cause that’s my last name on Instagram and I think I’m actually private on Facebook and my website, Katelyn 

[00:22:16] Dane Reis: [00:22:16] Love it. Caitlin, thank you so much for joining me today. It has been wonderful to have you. Thank you so much for joining us today. My one call to action for you is to go to and join our free email community.

[00:22:35] Where we dig deep into a continually growing resource of truly actionable things you can be doing right now to help you advance your entertainment career. Don’t miss an episode. We have a new guest, seven days a week search for you, booked it on Apple podcast or your favorite podcast app and subscribe today.

[00:22:59] All the best to you. We’ll see you tomorrow.